My mother’s friend
Though it’s been over a year since my mother died, I have always been able to count on her best friend (who’s now my friend by default, I guess, she’s older than I, but, younger than my mother) to talk about my mother with me.
We’ve been communicating on a regular basis, and, she’s tried to keep up with my kids, mainly because I think my mother asked her to. But, lately, she’s been a bit distant, with issues of her own.
I guess even she’s moved on a bit from my mother’s death, and, rightly so. I guess I had just gotten used to having someone fuss over the kids, and, freely talk about my mother.
I know if I needed anything, she’s do it in a minute, but, I’m trying to figure out if she feels she’s “put in her time” with me, or, if it’s just a phase in our friendship. She does have a tendency to get caught up in herself (’tis true, but, just part of who she is), so, I don’t think it’s me, but, it’s still left me feeling a bit lonely, in a way.
Tags: intergenerational-friendships, My Mother, sandwich-generationRelated Stories
POSTED IN: My Mother
3 opinions for My mother’s friend
Melissa
Sep 5, 2007 at 1:35 pm
Is it because you lost your mother and now you are loosing the connection that you had to your mother? I’m just guessing.
Jamie
Sep 6, 2007 at 9:29 am
I think people do that. They don’t want a commitment. We all have a selfish nature, I’m not saying because we are bad. We are just wired that way. If she is truely a friend you should talk to her.
JayMonster
Sep 6, 2007 at 1:09 pm
Have you considered that you may be looking at this a bit too closely?
I mean think about your own friends… conversations, and the number you have with many of them, most likely ebb and flow from time to time. You may talk to them “practically every day” for some time, then only “once in a while” for a period before things go back again.
I realize this is a remaining connection to your mom, and that you cherish it for that alone (and I am sure among other reasons), but particularly since as you noted she does have her own tendency to get self-absorbed, you may just be hitting one of those “dry spells”
Just a thought.
Have an opinion? Leave a comment: