Hi, there!
This evening, when I realized just what a cliche I have become, I thought of you guys and decided I should write something.
Some of you may be following the saga over at my other place, but, essentially, my father’s back is getting worse and worse. As a matter of fact, he can’t walk and is using a wheelchair right now.
He had an epidural steroid injection on Wednesday that, so far is no help, but, we’ll see. He’s missed 3 days of work (he teaches high school) which never happens.
I had no idea he missed work, despite the fact that I talk to him at least once a day. I figured it out when he sent me an e-mail in the middle of the day earlier this week.Since he really had to go back to work, I took him, wheelchair and all, to school and picked him up this afternoon.
Also, unbeknownst to him, I had a talk with the school staff and they are going to let me know if he’s missing school for anything, since, obviously, he’s not going to tell me.
The cliche part of my life came when I had him and The Preschooler Formerly Known as Busy Baby in the car this afternoon and we were looking for someplace to eat dinner. Since it’s Friday evening, every place was crowded, so we got something from a drive-thru and came back to may dad’s house.
The drive-thru took forever, so, I found myself managing a cranky 74 year old and a 4 year old, hoping they didn’t fight with each other. We came back to his house where I have served dinner to them both, washed dishes, played outside, done laundry, trimmed the hedges (long story), emptied the trash, fixed the computer, and, changed the bed.
It’s 8pm and I haven’t been home since 6:15 this morning.
Nah, I don’t resent it, it’s not all gloom and doom or anything, It’s just what I do. However, I am a bit tired and I need to watch myself so I don’t ask my father if he “went potty” yet.
Tags: back_pain, father, Sandwich_Generation
7 opinions for Hi, there!
Busymom.net
Sep 20, 2006 at 5:02 pm
Attempting to “how too” - now with more pie!…
Many moons ago, I used to be able to write, I could even sound somewhat professional in those writings if I put my mind to it. I know! Don’t worry, I just thought the same thing you did, it’s OK…….
Latte Man
Sep 22, 2006 at 2:25 pm
We worried about this with my father, and I mentioned it not long after you mother passed. Some of what you are having to deal with is the “manly” desire to “not be a problem” which ultimately winds up being more of a problem since they won’t tell you (i.e. the not knowing about missing three days of school).
Hopefully you can get it through to him that you would feel MORE comfortable and more at ease if you didn’t have to worry about him “not telling” you things.
GenBetween » Dad update
Sep 26, 2006 at 6:58 am
[…] Well, my poor father is still having back trouble. He’s still using the wheelchair and is pretty frustrated. […]
GenBetween » It’s a wheelchair, not a stupid stick
Sep 29, 2006 at 4:12 pm
[…] Since my father has been in the wheelchair, I have really noticed people talking down to him. While I know that it is, for the most part, unintentional, it happens. For example, at the doctor’s office or at the store, people always look at me when it comes time to pay even though he is sitting there in a suit and tie with a credit card in hand. One time, he was manuevering his wheelchair in place to check out at the grocery and the clerk looked at me and tsk-tsked in a condescending tone while saying, “They are just so independent, aren’t they?” More specifically, she was implying that I “let” him feel “useful” by allowing him pay for his own groceries. […]
GenBetween » Heh
Oct 4, 2006 at 9:54 pm
[…] We’ve been taking my father and his wheelchair (temporary situation because of a back injury, if you’re just joining in) to my 1 year old son’s football games on Saturday mornings. […]
GenBetween » On new routines
Nov 11, 2006 at 9:46 am
[…] It’s taken my father and me this long to get to some semblance of a normal routine since my mother’s death in July, and, his subsequent back problems, surgery and recovery. […]
EnableMart.com
Mar 27, 2008 at 7:19 pm
[…] For example, I probably should have gotten my father one of the sock and shoe aids after his back surgery. Even when he could stay alone, I had to go by his house each morning to get his socks and shoes on […]
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